Writing Help: Formal Diction

How do I use formal diction (formal tone, formal language) in my essay?

1. Avoid contractions (it's, I'm, they're).

2. Avoid using colloquialisms, slang, and clichés (think outside the box, lend a hand, has issues with . . . ).

Needs revision:

The narrator is freaked out at the thought of having a blind man turn up at his home.

Better:

The narrator is uncomfortable at the thought of having a blind man visit his home.

 

3. Avoid using first-person pronouns (I, me, we). That is, don't get personal: doing so will give your writing an informal and casual tone. Keep in mind, too, that this essay isn't about you: if you are writing about a work of literature, the essay is about the work of literature.

Needs revision:

I recently asked a friend of mine, who is blind, to help me get a better perspective on what it's like to be blind. As we were sitting in a café, I tried to describe the surroundings to him but I realized I had no vocabulary to effectively describe the colours of the room, or the objects in it, or even the expressions and attitudes of the people around us. It was then that I understood what the author was getting at in this story.

 

4. Avoid addressing the reader as "you." This, too, will give your writing an informal and casual tone.

Needs revision:

Imagine never having seen anything. Imagine needing to have everything described to you, and never seeing the world's splendour with your own eyes.

 

5. Avoid describing the characters' thoughts and reactions with the pronoun "you."

Needs revision:

This quotation demonstrates that the narrator finds it inconceivable that you could be married to and love a woman if her physical appearance was unknown to you.

Better:

This quotation demonstrates that the narrator finds it inconceivable that a man could be married to and love a woman if her physical appearance was unknown to him.

 

6. Write in the present tense when describing the events in a work of literature, or when discussing the author's techniques.

Needs revision:

The narrator realized immediately that describing the buildings was difficult.

The author characterized the narrator as an insensitive and cynical man.

Better:

The narrator realizes immediately that describing the buildings is difficult.

The author characterizes the narrator as an insensitive and cynical man.

 

7. No exclamation marks! (And no multiple exclamation marks!!!!!!)